So....

The other day, Matthew texted me. At first all sorts of emotions ran through me. Anger, Sadness, Happiness. I really wanted to text him back! I thought I was gonna give in, I thought I wasn't strong enough, I thought...WRONG! After I had a talk with Rachel(Thanks Rach) I realized, I dont need him. The only thing he would do was make me trust him again and hurt me again, and its not worth it. SO I ignored the text. An hour later comes another one "I know you're reading my messages. Text me back." I just laughed and deleted it. I wanted him to text me for SO long and I knew if he did things had a chance of going back to normal. Than I talked to my mom who has learned from experience "Some people never change, you can't change them, they have to want it" And he doesnt. So that made it easier. And the fact that its now MY choice that were not talking. If I decide to talk to him, he will talk to me. So after the 2nd text i figured he gave up. That night i was up most of the night sick. When I woke up I had 6 missed calls and a voice mail from him. It felt good to finally be on the other end of this. So i still havent responded. Im pretty proud of myself.